A New Beginning

"You be good, now," my mother said to me as I left her and my brother on that fine, beautiful Sunday morning. I said of course, mom, I'll be good. I smiled at her, and I gave my brother a hug and said "Take care of mom, bro. Let me know if you want anything from Manila."

I miss them already right now, and it's only been a little more than a week since that day I left for Manila. Things have been quite eventful ever since. Doing a whole different project is quite an interesting learning experience, especially an overseas project. New acquaintances, new settings, new experiences. I am blessed.

And being here, away from home, away from my past, is quite a revelation. Eventhough the anchor that holds me to my past has not completely been lifted,

"Now I know everything depends on your Mom."

But, yeah, a time away from it all is what I need. Time to rethink all the right things I did, and all the mistakes I've made. It would really be nice if I could just walk forward, forget the past and embrace the present. But right now, the past clings on and I let it cling on me.

"How could you do this to me?"

My mother would really love it here. I'm thinking of taking her to that church with the huge tabernakel (I haven't seen it myself, but I heard from a friend). Especially since she is fond of everything that has got to do with her religion. I think I will have to arrange a time for her to come here. It would really be nice to have her here.

"I don't love you anymore."

Once again, I have my own personal space. And it's a good thing, especially since I live in a very crowded place. It's not because there is a lot of people, but because it's a very small place.

Manila, it's like going back in time. The place does reminds me of Jakarta, but I couldn't put a finger on what's wrong until a friend of mine said that it's like Jakarta in the eighties. She's right...it's like I've gone back in time. The buildings and the roads, it's just sort give off that kind of vibe.

"We can't be friends."

This morning I went to church, and as I was sitting there I was reminded of who I was. And that person, the one in the past tense, still exists in the present tense. But it's been sleeping all along. And that realization reminded me of an old friend. A very good friend. A brother, and a father. He's been with me all along, through good times and bad times. Even though I don't keep in touch with him all the time, but we understand each other perfectly. And, my friend (you know who you are), thanks for everything. You're a very good friend and I'm lucky that you are. My friend. I'll try and pay you a visit whenever I can.

"..."